For Wives Only


OK, girls, the guys aren’t listening, so we can talk privately.

I talk to a lotta ladies who wish they could have a “Do-Over” with their husbands, but it’s too late.  It’s over.  Their husbands have shut down….gone.  So many marriages have ended in divorce.   Now, I know there are lots of reasons for divorce, and I’m just going to talk about one.

And, don’t get mad at me, if I say some things that make you mad.   If you pay attention, you might just thank me later.


My favorite job every day is to make my husband happy.  And, not to sound all big-headed, but I’m very good at it.  1 Cor. 9:24 says to “Run in such a way that you may win.”  I can’t imagine anything more important to be good at!  He is the happiest man in the world.  He never imagined marriage could be this good.  I am a “Professional Husband Happy Maker”.  You would fall over to hear the things I say to him, the things I do for him.  Yep. Sorry, I’m not going into great detail.  But let your mind run wild. 

First of all, everybody who knows me, knows what I call him.  Mr. Wonderful.  Yep.  Because that is who he is.   You can use that name for your husband too, if you like, or make up your own.  (Be nice.)  Just remember that he will BE that Name.  

He is sweet and loving.  He is patient and kind. He is faithful and hard-working. (reminds me of Galatians 5:22)  He is gorgeous and sexy.  And I tell him.   All the time.   I tell him he’s all the good things and none of the bad things.  And it’s true.  And it’s truer every day.

Everyone who sees us, whether at home or out, can tell by the way I look at him, that I adore him.   They can tell by the way I talk to him and talk about him, that I love and respect him beyond my words. 

But that’s just the start of it.  No one knows what goes on behind closed doors.  My husband knows at home, he is king.  I would do anything in the world for him, happily.  And, he would do anything for me.   Home really is his castle, because at home he is free to be himself.   Free——-

The reason I am telling you this, is in hopes that it will give you hope.  Your marriage can be “Off the Charts Awesome”.  Here’s what you’ve GOT to do:


Focus on what your husband does right.  And SPEAK IT.

Put THOSE words into the air…and into His ears.  (See\Resources  100 Wonderful Things To Say)

If you have a complaint, take it to the Real Complaint Department… the Lord.

Hello?  Did you think your husband was the Complaint Department?  Well, he’s not!

Listen to the one who wrote Psalm 142.

“I cry aloud with my voice to the Lord;

I make supplication with my voice to the Lord.

I pour out my complaint before Him;

I declare my trouble before HIM.

When my spirit was overwhelmed within me.”

Jesus is the only one who can make any significant change, any lasting change in anyone or anything, anyway.   All the badgering in the world from you actually has a negative effect.  One whisper from the Lord into your husband’s ears, and that’s all it takes.   Tell Him. Trust Him.


You know it’s true…. we women can have a 1000 things going right, and we’ll find 1 thing that’s not going right, and we’ll focus on it like a laser!   And we’ll let that one thing that’s bothering us spin around in our heads until it makes us crazy, and we have to spew it out all over our poor husbands.   STOP IT!   Rather, let’s focus on what is going right.  LOVE LOVE LOVE Philippians 4:8 “Summing it all up, friends, I’d say you’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse.”  Seriously.  Let’s get Control of our Minds!  That’s where the battle starts.  Think on the GOOD THINGS – there are a bunch to keep you busy!


I’d say the # 1 Key to a Happy Marriage is ……ya ready for this?  It’s not really sexy…

HUMILITY.   Told you is wasn’t sexy.   He is humble.  I am humble.  He doesn’t have to have HIS way.   I don’t have to have MY way.  He lets it go if I say something a little grumpy once in a while.  I let it go if he doesn’t do something exactly the way I want him to.  Simple.  Simply Powerful.  Jesus said, “Whoever loses his life for My sake, he is the one who will save it.” Luke 9:24 Same goes for marriage.


Now, I like to fix up as much as the next girl….   But even though “my dear husband” might see me without makeup, I always want him to see me with my “inner” makeup on! Did your mom ever tell you “Pretty IS as Pretty DOES”?  I think she must have gotten that from 1st Peter chapter 3.

Be good wives to your husbands, responsive to their needs. There are husbands who, indifferent as they are to any words about God, will be captivated by your life of holy beauty. What matters is not your outer appearance—the styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes—but your inner disposition.  Cultivate inner beauty, the gentle, gracious kind that God delights in. The holy women of old were beautiful before God that way, and were good, loyal wives to their husbands. Sarah, for instance, taking care of Abraham, would address him as “my dear husband.” You’ll be true daughters of Sarah if you do the same, unanxious and unintimidated.

I’m not so foolish to think this will solve EVERY marriage problem.  But, it can take a good whack at a buncha them! 

Today, say these things to your husband.

·         I love you with all of my heart.

·         Thank you for everything you do for our family.

·         You are so wonderful and amazing.

·         I am so thankful for you.

·         You are my dream man.

I’ve told women this, and they say their husbands are going to look at them as if they‘ve lost their minds.   Well that’s a sad state of affairs.    Because, those are the kinds of things a woman who would have an affair would say to him…and you know it!

So, if necessary, start by saying just one.  And build up.  We don’t want them to have a heart attack from the shock!    And, of course, you won’t be telling him anything negative.  Remember, complaints go directly to the Lord.  That shift will be shock enough!

And before you know it, your marriage will be AMAZING.

OK, you know WHAT to do…. Now you need the power to DO IT!  Will-power won’t cut it.  It won’t last.  You need God-Power!  Ask Him for it.  He will make you more than able by His Spirit… just learn from Him and lean on Him.

Then you will hear Jesus whisper these wonderful words into your ear, “Well done, my good and faithful servant.”

And from your husband, you will hear, “You make me happier and happier every day.”   That’s even better than him taking out the trash!

Make sure to share this blog with your friends, so they can share with their friends…and make every marriage AMAZING!

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